Monday, August 12, 2013

Why 4 inches is better than 6 inches

      Okay…get your minds out of the gutter. I’m talking protractors. For those of you who are lucky enough not to have a fifth grade back-to-school supply list, protractors are those half-moon shaped thingys that kids use in math and come back to you at the end of the year snapped in half and covered in glue stick crud. My husband thought I was referring to the thing that looks like a nutcracker with a sharp point at one end and a place for a pencil at the other.
     “That’s a compass,” I told him.
     “Compasses are for navigation,” he replied.
     “Then you can navigate the back-to-school list.”
     Oh how I love those back-to-school lists! Every year, they are more and more like treasures hunts. This year, our list includes things like: green two pocket folders and marble notebook, must be 8 ½ inch size.
     And of course, the wonderful 4-inch protractor.
     I ran around Staples, Rite-Aid, Target and CVS like a nut trying to get a four inch protractor. Every place carries only the 6-inch kind. But the list said: must be four inches. I started imagining the terrible moment when my daughter’s teacher asks all the kids in the room to whip out their 4 inches and my daughter pulls out her six. What kind of mother am I? What next? Am I going to forget to cut the crusts off my daughter’s bread?
     Well, at least I didn’t fail the green two-pocket folder test. I almost couldn’t find a folder in Kelly green. I was about to settle for a teal-colored one (sort of green-ish?) when I found one in grass green. Social services would certainly have been after me then…

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